For the Love....

Alright thank you everyone for your support and love. I go through hard times sometimes and I have a hard time expressing myself because I don't want to be a burden... So thanks for listening and showing me how much you all care. It really does mean a lot.

So lately I've kind of been wondering when these trials will end. Will I have learned enough to finally meet a guy that wants to be with me just as much as I want to be with him. Last week I went to a fireside where they said trials like these give us an opportunity to gain our own personal relationship with the savior. I really do believe that. I feel that my testimony has grown and I do feel closer to my savior... How close does he want me to get? I think I'm done being tried in this area. I want to find someone I can spend the rest of eternity with. I'm tired of being alone. I wish I could be happy and content being single... but I can't seem to make that work. Don't get me wrong I have a good life and I'm happy most of the time. But sometimes I feel so alone and lonely that even hanging out with friends doesn't help. Does anyone have any suggestions... I'm asking guys out... I'm open to set ups.... I just don't know how much bolder I can be... How do you find good guys.... I seem to just find frogs.... Is there somewhere I can go? Maybe its an impossible task... I guess by 26 most of the good guys are gone... but theres got to be someone out there....

Sorry for my ramblings.. I just had to get it out :)

Here we go again

Well if you haven't heard yet I'm back on the market... Story of my life! but its good I get the opportunity to start over. so I get to go back to asking guys out... since we all know they don't know how to ask... and go on lots of group dates. Nothing else really to report. Life is full of learning experiences that make us stronger. I'm grateful to know I'm not alone and there is always hope.

Dating Dating and more Dating!!

So this past week the fam went up to park city. Which was a ton of fun we did lots of shopping and playing... it was really great.... but the highlight of my weekend is this.

The previous saturday I went to our pledge breakfast and met a friend (Heather) of a friend (Chris). We started talking. This friend had invited me to go to the nicklecade. unfortunately I was in park city but this Chris mentioned to Heather that I don't seem to go to anything anymore because I have a boyfriend... Which the last time we hung out yes I had a boyfriend.

So I text him and said that I wouldn't be able to hang out tonight since I'm on vacation in park city with the family... not because I have a boyfriend. so Chris and I proceeded to talk. And he discovered that I no longer have a boyfriend. and we made plans to hang out on friday when I got back from park city.

On wednesday Nikkole mentioned that our hang out was actually going to be a date... I was in complete denial because chris and I are just friends. Anyway so I text him and asked who else would be hanging out with us... and he said that actually he was thinking of just taking me out on a date.

So we go on this date... and I'm thinking we're just friends. THis is just for fun... and besides I said I wanted to go on a date every weekend. Well it turns out I really like him ... and he likes me... so I believe we're dating now... but its not official yet!! YAY me! I knew this would be great year!

Anyway just thought I'd share!

Update!

So here is an update on my date....

We met at Sugarhouse park at 7.... Sugarhouse is a really big park so the girls ended up in one area of the park and our dates were in a different area both matching the description of where we were meeting...

Anyway so I called my date and they ended up coming over to us since I was completely turned around! so then we had a picnic. we made peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and then went to play ultimate frisbee! it was a super cheap date and we all had a blast. Tanner ( my date) even text me the next morning saying we should do it again!

This is very encouraging! I'm excited to ask more guys out! This is going to be a fabulous year I just know it! :)

YAY ME!!!

So I just have to report on my biggest break through... Most of you know I have many insecurities, with that I become shy, and I'm single which means I want to date a lot but unfortunately guys can also be shy or something and they don't like to ask girls out.

So my weekend. I was hanging out with some of my friends in my sorority and one of them (sara) mentioned she wanted to go on a date this next weekend. And I had already made up my mind that I want to date lots. So I said lets go on a group date. We had a frat party to go to later that night so we decided we would find out dates there.

So we make it to the party and we see a group of guys sitting on the bleachers. Sara jokingly said hey lets go talk to them. So I started to head over. She then said wait lets make sure they are the best option. So we look around and they happened to be the only group of guys not talking to girls... so we start heading over. I introduced us and we started talking. I then told them that we needed dates for friday night which one of them are going to be our dates.... We got 4 of the 5 guys to agree to come on a date with us.!!! yay! And I failed to mention they were pretty cute!

Later that evening I also went and introduced myself to two other guys who will be potential dates in the future!! yay me!!!

Its been awhile...

I alway seem to think about my blog when something exciting... or traumatic happens... but what about the rest of the time... well I was thinking about this yesterday as our whole sacrament meeting was on keeping a journal... I felt this urge to start a journal.... again.

Yeah I get this urge every couple of years and it lasts for about a day or two. and then I realize I dont' have anything to write about...

I wake up, go to work, go home, sleep. But when I look deeper... there are lots of things that happen in a day for instance yesterday..

Yes I woke up at 7 AM and joined my ward to go to Music and the Spoken word... I've never been to one before. It was actually really nice and it lasted the perfect amount of time... but then they announced they were going to have a short meeting afterwards to commemorate the 80 years of broadcasting. so our ward decided to stay..... most of the talks were short however there was one guy who stood and seriously thank everyone who has been or will be involved with the choir. OH MY HECK! there comes a point when a standing ovation no longer means anything... For me it was after the 3rd time. And I was a little offended that I wasn't thanked... It felt like everyone one else was! I mean come on! just kidding :)

After he sat down we did get to hear from President Monson so all in all it was worth sitting through the many thanks!

Anyway... Thats all for now! :)

Crazy Crazy Ogden

Hello everyone! So my exciting weekend consisted of running in the Ogden Marathon. I mentioned this at the beginning of my training back in february. Well here is the result of my training. I ran the 5 miles. I stopped for 1 minute due to side cramps but decided it was better just to run through it. So I ran the 5 miles in 45 minutes and 3 seconds.

If you remember at the beginning of my training I couldn't even run a mile! I am just really glad that I did it. Yay me! I am definantly doing this again next year... I met so many great people just waiting for my turn to run. And to know that I did something that was super challenging is just exciting! Today I am burnt sore and can barely walk due to blisters on my feet but its totally worth it! I am officially addicted :)

Someday...

Someday my life will be perfect...
Someday I'll graduate from college....
Someday I'll have the job of my dreams...
Someday I'll meet that perfect guy...
Someday I'll have the perfect house...
With the perfect kids...
with the perfect lawn...

Someday I'll grow up and realize this just isn't going to happen... So Today I will enjoy what I have...My life may not be perfect but its my life. So I should stop thinking "Someday it'll be better" And I should start enjoying what I have. If I'm not satisfied now when am I ever going to be satisfied? Right!!! :)

Adventures in the Singles Ward

One of the great things about being single is the fact that I get to be apart of a very exclusive group... The Singles Ward. I know most people don't enjoy their experience and some are glad they have never had to endure the singles ward. I on the other hand really enjoy it... mainly because I love awkward moments... especially watching them!

So church on sunday was no exception to these awkward moments... Justin could give you more detail since it happened to him but since I found it highly entertaining I thought I would share.

There is a girl in the ward who ever since she found out that Nikkole and Justin are in fact related and NOT dating, has been trying to pry her way into Justin's life!! This girl is moving so Sunday was her last attempt to leave an impression on Justin... She left an impression alright!

So it started in Sunday School... Justin happened to have a seat open next to him so of course she sits down next to thats pretty natural and nothing too bad.... then Sacrament meeting came. She sat next to Justin and at first it was a normal distance... but then through out the meeting she kept getting closer and closer... she probably would have been more comfortable on his lap instead of being squished next to him... so Justin trying not to be rude leans forward... So she puts her arm around the back of the bench... and finds any excuse to be close to him. Then at the end of the meeting she is saying goodbye. And let me just add this little note... we are friends but not the type of friends that hug or that she would have hugged goodbye. However since Justin is my brother... yesterday we became close friends Anyway so she gets in one last attempt and comes up with an excuse to hug him...it was all I could do to keep from laughing.

I'm sorry it was rather funny... unfortunantly my writing skills are not what they should be so I probably didn't do the story justice at all but let me just tell you we were laughing about that one all day! Its funny the things you witness in a singles ward!

I can see clearly now the rain is gone!

Well I have some very exciting news for those of you who don't already know. I no longer need contacts or glasses... thats right I was brave and had Lasik Surgery. Its funny I would have thought I would have been super nervous. However I got a very different reaction.

I woke up the day of the surgery just so excited I was practically bouncing off the walls... for those of you that see me regularly I generally do bounce off the walls but not when I'm going to have a laser in my eye! :)

Anyway I go in to eye center and I was just chatting away with everyone I came in contact with... Also a very different reaction for me... as most of you know I am a very quiet person. Anyway, then the happy drugs kicked in... and I couldn't even tell a difference other than I was super tired... which made the actual surgery a little difficult. When they went to fix my left eye I kept falling asleep. YIKES! but no worries the lasers have been perfected enough to detect movement.

So by the next day I woke up with 20/20 vision yay! The only thing I have to deal with now is very dry eyes but at least thats just temporary! :)

Confessions of a Shopaholic

I've always been one to say "I hate shopping, I'm a get in get out kind of girl. Why would anyone love to shop, theres way to many people and the prices are so high who can afford this... not to mention have you seen the jeans they make these days... yeah right!" So as you can see Shopping was so not my thing any new clothes I got was because it was either my birthday or christmas and someone else went to the store for me!

Well recently I've realized that I love shopping. I love trying on new clothes. I love the smell. I love the joy in finding something that fits just right! I love the quick pick me up after having a bad day. (It's amazing how getting a new outfit will take away the pain of what ever!) I love how on good days I can shop and find something cute just because and it makes the good day even better! I love taking my time and just looking at all of my options. I love the prospect of finding the outfit that feels like it was made just for you. I love the snug fit of a brand new pair of jeans that make you feel like a million bucks!

Luckily I'm very aware of my finances so I don't charge my credit cards up the wazoo! However I can relate to the Confessions of a shopaholic... it is almost lke the stores speak to you!

Crystal Needs...

So thought I would copy my lovely cousin Robyn. So I googled Crystal needs and this is what I got:

-Crystal needs a LOT of love
-Crystal needs someone that will be patience
-Crystal needs a home
-Crystal needs replacement
-Crystal needs to sit in a super-saturated solution to continue growing ( Yay I'll be tall before you know it!!!)
-Crystal needs a park
-Crystal needs to be coated french-english vocabulary (huh?)
-Crystal needs identified
-Crystal needs help
-Crystal needs to chill out

So I thought it was really funny!

Do you ever have those days where if someone looked at you funny you burst out in tears? I am just way too sensitive... first of all I woke up this morning with very negative thoughts about myself... although true... its probably not good to dwell on the negative. But yesterday I realized I have become a completely selfish person... Anyway so then I get to work and well lets just say something wasn't done correctly and so of course I was talking bad about myself and then to have that happen the tears just started to come I couldn't stop them. I knew I was crying for no reason but when I would tell myself that I would cry harder... Boy do I hate being sensitive!!! Anyway I realize I shouldn't post this but sometimes I just need to let it out, so I'm going to anyway.... sorry for the negativity:)

I Love to Sweat

Ok So it has now been a week since I started training. There are a few things I learned.
1. Running isn't as easy at it looks.
2. The Treadmill is completely different from running outside.
3. I love the feeling when I've just completed a run. I'm dripping in sweat, I'm sore and completely worn out.... I love it!

Thats all I've learned so far but training is going ok. There are days when I just don't think I can do it but I always have someone there to tell me that I can... Anywho! Have a great day!

The Sweat the Soreness... The prices we pay to be fit!!

So as some of you may have read in Nikkole's Blog, I am training for a marathon. And yes while I am only running 5 miles... 5 miles is a lot for me.

I'm the girl in the gym class who just didn't have it. Every friday we had to run a mile and a half and those that made it in 14 minutes could just walk the next week. I wanted so much to be part of that group. So one friday I decided to go for it. So I ran my hear out being very careful to count each lap... Well I ran the mile and half in 15 minutes. Yep I was a minute short and so sick I could hardly stand. So my teacher watching me run throughout the 15 minutes said... "I think you ran an extra lap" So I ended up being able to walk the next week. But I know I didn't he just felt so bad for me. Pathetic I know but it'll get better the more I do it right?

Yesterday was day 2 of training... I'm super sore but I love it. Although I have a lot of work ahead of me if I'm going to be ready for the 5 miles, just ask Nikkole and Justin! But they have been a huge help. Anyway thats all for now :)

A few things I've learned over the past week

This week has been everything but expected. But there are several things I've learned. I have to write them down so that I remember that I learned them.

1. Family is number 1. They are the ones that are there for you no matter what!
2. When you need help don't be afraid to ask. ( this is huge for me.... I think I'm a bit of a control freak!! :))
3. Remember the lord is always there and he always has a plan... even though it may not be what you expect or what you planned for yourself... trust me his plan is better though it may not appear to be the case on the outside.
4. Good friends are so important. Like it or not they really do impact our decisions! When times get rough true friends are there to offer a shoulder to cry on or an ear to listen.

Like I said it was just a few things but if I don't write it down I'll probably forget when the next trial comes my way. I know this because the lord seems to really want me to learn how to ask for help and rely on others. :) Who would have thought!!

Back to the Drawing Board

So most of you have probably heard... I'm single again. So I've decided to make some changes... as what happens to most when they break up with someone they actually like. So next week I will be starting a Yoga class. This week I joined a sorority at the U. And I believe I've changed my major for good. I'm going to go into Culinary Arts! I need something creative in my life and whats better than food... especially good food. And usually cooking helps me clear my mind. So we'll see where life takes me. Wahoo!

Anyway that is all thats going on with me, for those of you who have been waiting for an update... there ya go! YAY for me!